I think you achieve what you set out to do extraordinarily well.
I got a strong sense of Sam's desire for Dean & protectiveness, not to mention how much he just wants Dean. And the switch to Dean's POV is very effective. Dean being torn between experiencing that kind of pleasure and wanting his boy bits back hurts the reader just like it hurts Dean.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2008-01-12 05:38 pm (UTC)I got a strong sense of Sam's desire for Dean & protectiveness, not to mention how much he just wants Dean. And the switch to Dean's POV is very effective. Dean being torn between experiencing that kind of pleasure and wanting his boy bits back hurts the reader just like it hurts Dean.
(And you wrote PORN!)